Tuesday, May 30
2Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. 4Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
-James 1:2-4
i realised last night that i've been too weighed down by the up-coming exercise these few weeks and that the exercise has been taking up too much of my attention...i must keep reminding myself, despite all the distractions of the exercise, what my focus is...and also not to neglect the other aspects of my life, esp my spiritual life...
jel; 11:37 am
Monday, May 29
its hard to describe this week...as the preparation for exercise builds up, i can't imagine what are expected of us in these few days...already some of us are showing signs of rejection even on mon, the first day of the week...with the start of the exercise this sun, we can only look forward to the end of it....
really need a well-deserved break after next week.....
jel; 9:36 pm
Sunday, May 28
i guess i really need time to slow down my pace somehow...my time is really squeezed these few weeks...i barely have enought time to rest at home...it seems lk i need to rush to meet my schedules each weekend...i hardly have enough time to sleep...sleeping in the wee hours of the morning...waking up early in the morning...rushing to go out, complete things that i need to do at home during the weekends and before i know it, its time to book in again...and i really feel i'm spending too little time with my family...esp these few weeks, its esp bad...i hardly see them for more than a few hours each weekend...next weekend wld be worst, considering i need to book in early sunday...
i need the calmness, not to be overcome by the fast pace and tight schedules...i need the strength, to continue to excel despite the lack of rest...i need the passion, not to grow weary in the midst of the hectic schedules...
thank you so much Lord..i know that in you i need not worry abt my needs....
jel; 12:56 am
Saturday, May 27
just got back home from night range...thanks jason for sending me back home...really exhausted by now...anw, this long, tiring week is finally over....yet another hectic week, staying up late at night, building btoc, preparing for exercises, range....the tempo now is definitely very high and its still building up in the coming weeks....
need to rest now...my mind is not in any state of thinking now...
jel; 12:12 am
Tuesday, May 23
15 The LORD God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to work it and take care of it.
-Genesis 2:15
Do you dread getting up Monday mornings? Do you refer to your job as the "daily grind" or "working in the salt mines"? If so, it's a clear indicator that something is wrong. Somewhere, somehow, you've lost your purpose for what you're doing.
God gave work as a gift (Genesis 2:15)...He meant for it to fulfill a purpose in our lives. In fact, work should fulfill several purposes. More often than not, we overlook these purposes and end up dragging the work that we're doing...we shld not miss this gift from Him and pursue the wrong desires in life....
This is the motivation for me to continue to work hard in my job scope and discover the purposes of this gift that He has given to me...
jel; 8:50 pm
Monday, May 22
booked in straight to camp after church yest...had to be back for some training in preparation for ops...worked till the wee hours of the morning...cldn't really take it towards the last few hours cause i didn't really recupurate my sleep over the weekends...and today i have guard duty...i can see a hectic week ahead again...
my mind is still half asleep right now...can't really think well at this moment...i need my sleep and rest!
jel; 9:04 am
Saturday, May 20
when the devil wants to set obstacles, he can do it through many ways to cause misery and depressions...and i just felt that my family is facing a critical period right now...and its affecting me very badly right now...at this very moment...the situation has worsened since the previous weeks....and i dun wish to see my family fall apart and it breaks my heart to witness the state of the situation....
just speaking of this week alone, i myself have been facing challenges in camp...lk i mentioned in my previous post, when u remain accountable for your responsibilities, u end up sacrificing other commitments...and i end up being weighed down by all these conflicts..which really drain me out not really mentally but spiritually....even now for the weekends, the devil is doing all those to the loved ones ard me....and the worst is i'm not ard during the wkdays, making me helpless in keepping myself updated with the situation and every wkend when i get home, things worsen and i feel so vulnerable at times...
what i really need now is to overcome all these obstacles set before me...of course, its not possible w/o the strength and help from the Lord...to go through this period tog with me.....this wld be tough esp when i have to handle various commitments at the same time...but all these wld be possible to overcome as long as i believe and seek in Him...all i need is You...
my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation. He is my stronghold, my refuge and my savior— from violent men you save me. -2 Samuel 22:3
jel; 10:37 pm
i'm really glad the cell outing turned out well despite the last-minute arrangements...of course, the change also caused some disappointments as well...,i'm really regretful that i didn't manage to put in my fullest commitment during this week and i was faced with certain difficulties too...really thank daniel for this arrangement...it was a good opportunity to interact with fellowmates from brighton community church...there is strength in numbers...and i really applause them for their great planning and coordination....the event was well-organised and smooth although i felt it wld be better if there ws some sort of introduction at the start to break some form of icee...but it was much of a prob cause most pple are ard the same age grp and we connect almost immediately....
the main event for the today was the combat skirmish game..some sort of lasermania, or smthng lk atech...having been exposed to the army environment for 5 days, it may seem particularly boring to face it again on sat...but it was extremely fun..prob one of its kind in s'pore...in a public park lk pasir ris park, playing such combat games in the midst of the public...with some many pple staring at us..haha,,its definitely a one-of-a-kind experience...having to prone down behind trees and slopes even when you're not in camp...anw, having prior experience from our ns experience, the nsf in my grp proudly transferred our knowledge to action...anw, everything was just played in the spirit of fun and competition but as a result, everyone was exhausted from all the running in the park....i wld agree that this unique game was definitely a cool experience from the usual sports....
thank you to all those from brighton for organising such a wonderful activity...u pple are a great bunch of energetic pple, bringing glory to our Lord....looking forward to more opportunities to work tog and to meet up as well...
jel; 10:24 pm
Friday, May 19
i really thank God just for allowing me to have this chance to be right here now sitting comfortably in front of my laptop...after all that i've been through this week, even the simplest pleasure in life is very appreciated...
this week has been an extremely long week for me...at least it felt lk so...as mentioned in my previous post, working hours have been way extended..last night a few of us had to work till past midnight to complete the given tasks...i wld say for the whole of this week, most of my waking hours were working hours...i went to sleep immediately after working cause i wld be too exhausted by then...
situations have been pushed to limits when we are being pushed by different grps of pple for datelines..and end up the schedules comflict one another....being stuck in the middle is the worst feeling in such situations..how are we going to explain the situation we're in?...when others do not understand this situation we're in, more often than not, we suffer in silent...its hard when we are bound in a regimental environment with little power to voice up our opinions..of course, i'm speaking for a certain grp of pple....and feeling weighed down by these issues certainly didn't help me in improving the situation....
as a result of my duty commitment, certain responsibilities were compromised as a result...and this is something i hate, having to sacrifice a equally impt issue when time is lacking...and yet, if i can't compromise on my work for the extra time needed...another stuck-in-the-middle stuation....sigh...but i'll preserve on..learning in the process how to improve on balancing on all my responsiblities, continuing on improving on my attitude towards my work, my interaction with my colleagues and camp mates.....
having being 'kept' in a camp environment for the past 5 days with nothing else but work, the feeling of being 'released' to the outside world and having that freedom is so wonderful....
jel; 11:47 pm
Thursday, May 18
nv has the manpower in my branch been squeezed so dry before...these few days, with the extra workload all of sudden and extremely limited manpower, the few of us left had been feeling the increased stress level...i'm not very satisfied with how things are going on here...somehow i felt that its not very efficient but its really beyond nsf's control...which is quite a sad thing cause in the end we are the ones who suffer as well...for the past few days, we had been working from early morning to late nights...minimum hours of sleep and rest, doing all sort of preparation and work...exercises and events concurrently going on at the same time...and when we get busy, miscommunications occur, arguments and temper arises..thats when things get worst...
anw, its gonna be a hard period right now..we are expected to work beyond our core duties, way past working hours and to sacrifice extra time out of our free time...but i'm glad most of us are going through this period tog, being responsible and committed in our jobs...i really want to go through it with the best attitude and mentality...doing things in the right manner and the way that it shld be...somehow, there's a hidden meaning when i mention this...but i dun wish to elaborate right now....thank you God for giving me the strength as well as the ability to think and carry out my duties according to His way....
jel; 7:51 pm
Tuesday, May 16
will be busy for the next few days...preparatiion for exercises..working from morning till night...and i'm already exhausted from yest and this morning...suffering from a bad headache now....i'll prob be absence from here for the next few days cause i'll try to have as much rest as possible, but i'll update if possible...
jel; 12:40 pm
Sunday, May 14
28 God blessed them and said to them, "Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air and over every living creature that moves on the ground."-Genesis 1:28One of our role is to help God rule the earth and we are called to disciple others...having being given h and wj under my care, i've the responsiblity to pass down the legacy to them, just as how the legacy of Abraham, Isaac and jacob has been passed down generations.....happened to read through my star-trekker book and re-read abt receiving destiny-legacy, delight-legacy and discipline-legacy in order to see the Vision fulfilled....i have to digest on those during the week...
got to book in soon....may everyone have a blessed week ahead!
jel; 8:55 pm
something which i've reflected upon for the past week...
God's Love and Ours 7Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God.-1 John 4:7the Lord asked us to love one another and this love comes from Him...and for the past, i've been able to understand and express more of this love for those ard me...i realised that for the past weeks, my kindness towards others are not so much because i know that kindness is part of being a "good" person but more because i love them and i do those stuff out of my love for them..and it really makes a lot of difference when the motive behind your actions is right....kindness is not longer a chore or even a necessity, it becomes part of you...i experienced joy whether or not the kindness has been appreciated cause i'm clear of my motivation...true joy is experienced not when you receive compliments from others but when u know you know your actions are justified by the right motivation....
that is really the difference bet one who loves based one's own justification and one who loves with the same love received from Him...and the latter's love will be able to withstand tests and will be ever-lasting...bearing this love, loving others like your family, friends or partner will bring about a whole new meaning....just encourage all of you to seek and understand this true love..trust me, you will truly appreciate the pureness of this love and you will learn to love others in a different manner...once you've experienced the greatness of true love, you'll nv settle for anything less...
jel; 8:10 pm
its easy to get distracted when one loses focus...once the focus of your mind is absent, you start getting lost without yourself knowing it....
had been too engrossed with my comp stuff for the past 2 days..realised i've been sticking to my comp most of the time when i'm at home and because of that, i had little time for other stuff...end up i either have to rush certain stuff or completely neglect them...the distraction from ext sources can be great and one can be easily influenced easily...sending appropriate amt of time is alright, but i've got to realise i've spent too much during the past 2 days, but i'm glad i've being reminded and pulled back before i lose my focus....time is precious..i know how my time is supposed to be spent and its definitely not how it was being spent during those days....Thank you Lord for your guidance and for being there always for me....what i really need to do now is to focus on my responsibilities as well to maximise the gifts that You have blessed me with....i'll surrender the rest according to your plans for me....
hmmm...i sense an urgency for me to learn the guitar...that wld be one of the other stuff i need to do at this moment other than my books....well, i dun really know the reason behind the urgency but i guess i'll know the reason soon.....
jel; 12:44 am
Friday, May 12
went to a few places today to shop and settle the list of stuff that i need to buy as well as to take a look at some items.....
went to times bookshop and ended up buying 2 books...audrey niffenegger's "the time traveler's wife" and "man and boy" by tony parsons...only intended to buy the former but since there's a 20% discount, i thought i might as well get the latter too....noticed the former book since last yr but just didn't get it till recently after recommendation from a friend....realised i better pick up a book to read now cause the previous book i've read was almost a month ago...i just thought ns time is great time to read more since there's little burden from studies....and at least by the time i ord, i wld have read a substantial number of books....my habit of reading actually came back during my ns time after a lack of time during jc and the inclination has shifted to fiction books too....anw, i'm so glad i've found back my love for reading after a long period of absence....
jel; 11:02 pm
just came back home after a short gathering with some of them after book-out...went back to tampopo at liang court for dinner...second visit there and the jap food there is simply great....recommend black pig ramen for first-timers..its definitely a must try....top off dinner with ice-cream at artivio....hersey's chocolate and mint...a fabulous combi....caught mi3 at ps later...intense movie packed with actions and thrills....but felt it was just another typical action movie with predictable plotline...the show ended too late and didn't manage to catch a train to jed's place...was quite disappointed that it didn't turn out as expected but i guess today was too rush already....hope there'll be another time....
gonna go sleep and enjoy this long wkend.....
jel; 1:21 am
Thursday, May 11
"But sometimes I think God has put us apostles on display, like prisoners of war at the end of a victor's parade, condemned to die. We have become a spectacle to the entire world--to people and angels alike.
"Our dedication to Christ makes us look like fools, but you are so wise! We are weak, but you are so powerful! You are well thought of, but we are laughed at. To this very hour we go hungry and thirsty, without enough clothes to keep us warm. We have endured many beatings, and we have no homes of our own. We have worked wearily with our own hands to earn our living. We bless those who curse us. We are patient with those who abuse us. We respond gently when evil things are said about us. Yet we are treated like the world's garbage, like everybody's trash--right up to the present moment" (1 Corinthians 4:9-13, NLT).
a verse which i need most at this moment....
jel; 9:06 am
Wednesday, May 10
The God of All Comfort
3Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, 4who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. 5For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows. 6If we are distressed, it is for your comfort and salvation; if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which produces in you patient endurance of the same sufferings we suffer. 7And our hope for you is firm, because we know that just as you share in our sufferings, so also you share in our comfort.
-2 Cor 1:3-7
jel; 12:09 pm
spent the whole of yest outfield...the thing is we end up doing nothing, so it was quite redundant...anyway, looking forward to this coming long wkend and the upcoming events being planned...there's a lot of stuff going on in my mind at this mind...things that i need to do, whether is it camp responsibilities or personal stuff....i think i need to find smthng to jot down all the tasks i need to do...the worst thing wld be to forget to do any one of those tasks...
haha, when i was too bored outfield last night, was thinking of how to personalise my own room when my bro move out next yr...i know its still far but i getting excited over planning what i can do to the room...
jel; 11:36 am
Sunday, May 7
attended a lesson on bibliology and christology at tc this morning...indeed a very valuable session which is a follow-up on the da vindi code project...and the session really helps in putting us in a better position to defend our faith...
i've had a few friends who had told me they wldn't believe what the bible has to say cause its all written by human beings, not God Himself...true, the words are written by man but we have to accept the fact that what have been written are true and the information can all be backed by historical evidences and various tests...i'm not going to elaborate on the evidences, but the words of the bible has withstand various tests over centuries over its authenticity....even the recent controversies caused by the da vinci code and the gospel of judas wldn't be able to dispute anything simply because the bible is the truth....
anyway, those ard me who weren't convinced didn't even read in depth on the words in the bible or know much abt it in the first place cause i'm sure when they do a more in-depth research, the authenticity can't be denied...i'm also surprised that there are some who accept God's existence and the facts written but simply didn't choose to believe in accepting Jesus into their lives...i guess its not easy for many out there to simply believe its the truth, but i believe there'll be a turning point in their lives in which they will realise the truth....
the bible is simply the most amazing book written in history...written by 40 authors, over a span of 1600 years, stretching over 40 generations, in 3 different continents, in 3 different languages at various places, yet there is continuity in the words which are centred on 1 single theme- God's redemption of this world through Jesus Christ, our Lord and Saviour....really thank the Lord for the words that have been passed down to us...it'll do Him injustice by trifling the importance of His words or simply neglecting His words...its sad when the bible can claim to be the bestseller yet being the least-read book in proportion to the books sold....
its another four-day workweek again...and i'm definitely looking forward to it....
jel; 7:09 pm
Saturday, May 6
i'm reading this book "a feast for the soul" by robert m solomon and one of the articles was commenting on the song Jesus We Enthrone You....the following are the lyrics to the song and the excerpt from the article:
Jesus, we enthrone You
We proclaim You are King
Standing here, in the midst of us
We raise You up with our praise
And as we worship, build Your throne
And as we worship, build Your throne
And as we worship, build Your throne
Come Lord Jesus, and take Your place
the problem with the song is that it unwittingly makes us the centre of the universe. We are the ones who enthrone Jesus and proclaim Him as king. It is our song and our worship that seem to make Him king, and we ask Him to build His throne as we affirm His kingship.The reality is that Jesus is the Enthroned One, whether we acknowledge it or not....
The author also mentioned that its(the song) great weakness is its faulty theology although he is quite sure that the writer meant well and wanted to express warm devotional sentiments, but the words lead us to enemy territory.
hmmm...rmb singing this song a few times before and now that i've read this article, i was thinking pondering over the words of the lyrics...i guess the intentions of the writer wasn't wrong..its probably how u intrepret the lyrics....its not through the proclaimation from us that He becomes king..yes, He is king whether we acknowledge it or not, but the writer is prob saying that we do that because of the fact that He IS king....
i guess we have to be discerning regards to the information that we receive...have to ensure that what we are receiving are true to His words and its not faulty theology....anw, i lk to hear your comments abt the song lyrics, anyone?
jel; 10:38 am
Friday, May 5
i really thank God for blessing me through this week...i book in to camp this week mentally prepared to face a difficult week ahead..but as i left camp today, i reflected upon how i managed to sail through this week with relative ease...i was prepared to spend fri doing the toughest job but today ended up being the easiest day of the week...its simply amazing...even when the day passed by today, i was surprised to even see how the events were unfolding...now that the week is over, its the weekend again to rechARGE!!!!
was browsing through my friendster acc after a long time of absence and once again i'm amazed at abt the connections of my friends...i was at the youthnet acc and saw dozens of connections, with youthnet as my fourth-degree friend....which means many of my friends' friend(s) are in youth net...my cousin, my friend's gf, my many other friends....and i realised jonong know one of my friend, samuel knows my bmt sergeant...this world is really indeed small when u have a wider circle of friends....
jel; 11:15 pm
Thursday, May 4
has been a long tiring 3 days for me...i was attached to 40 for some stuff for these 3 days and doing those preparation somehow tired me out physically and mentally although its not particularly busy throughout the entire..i had time to rest at certain periods of the day, just that maybe its due to the unfamiliar surroundings that i've placed...and maybe its due to having to do all these 'extra' worklord all of a sudden...
anw, i took it as a learning point...was pretty much impressed by the work attitude of those pple ard me...responsible, diligent and helpful...its makes job done much easier...and its definitely so much different from how the brigade is lk...and when u r tog with them, u wun feel lethargic cause they simply continue to do their job and nv complain or attempt to slack...i guess thats where i'm impressed by and a learning point to take back...but it also make me compare how different the the attitude is lk over here...well well...
anw, i'm still at the office now..just completed the task i was taken...this isn't how i wanted to end the day...and i'm not really looking forward to tmr except for the fact that i'm booking out....but i guess its just a natural reaction to the circumstances i'm facing...so far i've managed to go through the past few days believing in overcoming my feelings and i believe it'll be the same for tmr and the days ahead...
i'm really mentally drained now..can't really think properly...i guess i better sleep early tonight...have more to update when i get back home....
jel; 9:04 pm
Monday, May 1
Just came back from east coast park...super tired...but it was great fun today with the bandofbrothez...had been a long time since i've engaged in physical activities with a grp of friends...chose to cycle instead of rollerblading cause i didn't want to attempt to learn over a day...but i'm definitely learn one day...anw, some of us cycled while the rest rollerbladed...it was really fun engaging in jokes and laughters and attempting different ways of doing things...lk having the roller-bladers hitching a ride on the cyclists...its actually very dangerous but there was a certain element of excitement in it...and its very exhausting on the part of the cyclists, esp having more than one ppple behind you going up a slope..me and jon almost died at that slope...haha...
it was very crowded over at east coast today...met a few ex-8sab pple over there at the same area..such a coincidence...its lk i met yili rollerblading and then a few steps later i saw dingyan..guess many of us happened to want to do the same stuff today....played soccer after that...hey, and read this carefully, i played! those of you who have known me for some tiime wld know that i dun lk soccer and i dun play it...many of my friends prob wldn't have seen me play before...but hey, i guess today is an exception...i also dun know why too..and although i still suck at it, i did have my fair share of fun playing...surprise surprise!
although we didn't manage to stick to the initial plan of going jb in order to accommodate some of them, it was really an enjoyable day nevertheless...certain not-so-pleasant things happened, it was really a valuable time for the bandofbrothez to bond stronger tog and show a different fun side of us....personally i treasured the time spent, getting to join in the fun and share the laughter too and i think everyone of us enjoyed this time as well....looking forward to many more great times with the bandofbrothez as we grow stronger tog to walk the journey ahead of us...
tmr is the start of a busy period for me in camp and i really pray for the strength to walk through this period....
jel; 6:50 pm
i've just realised that someway or another, my siblings have some influences of christianity in their lives...for my sis, she was in gb in sec sch, read abt the bible before during that time and now she is teaching in a presbyterian sch...just that somehow christianity didn't influence her in anyway...and my bro told me he has attended one of my church's service before in marine parade...hmmm...didn't realise that they had some influences even before i got to know Christ...but i'm quite surprised and glad to hear all these...i know the responsibility i have in this family as a brother and a son and i'll commit myself to the responsibilites of these 2 roles....
got to rush off to marine parade now...meeting jedd at pp, and the rest at east coast park for rollerblading after that....
jel; 10:34 am
